An Offer She Can’t Refuse

Michael Cohen, in Greenland—to buy or not to buy, points out that our Developer-in-Chief’s offer was rebuffed by a surprised Danish Prime Minister, but as everyone knows, real estate deals take time. I have a suggestion for reviving the deal: make her an offer she can’t refuse.

A trade—for New England. The US would get Greenland, with all its cool (literally) natural resources, complete with potential golf courses, and would rid itself of all those pesky eggheads and snobs at MIT, Harvard and half the rest of the Ivy League. We in New England would trade up to join a civilized country that isn’t saturated with assault weapons and neo-Nazis. It would be a win-win; I can’t wait.

Hell, throw in New York; they’ve always hated DT, and refuse to stop persecuting the poor guy. He’d have to give up Trump Tower, but would still have Bedminster and Mara Lago. And he could be His Majesty, King of Greenland.

We’d get the Statue of Liberty and The Little Mermaid. I don’t know if a deal could be struck, but in the words of our (for now) leader, “Let’s see what happens.”

[Submitted to Globe letter to the editor but not selected for publication]